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Home ยป Family ยป Unplanned one on one time with the toddler is the best kind of time and a reminder why this time is so important.

Unplanned one on one time with the toddler is the best kind of time and a reminder why this time is so important.

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The last few months have been challenging with Jack. We have (and still are) battled OCD and we are knee high in tantrums. It feels like all I do is count to 3 every time we have to get dressed, eat, get in the car, get out of the car, bath, change clothes. If he is one of his moods the whole house is held to ransom by his screams, whines and demands.

As you know Cameron is now swimming, currently only 3 times a week until soccer ends in two weeks. It has been a month of driving up and down twice a day to gym and it’s a pain so I am trying to figure out ways to make it easier for all of us. So this week I tried getting dinner cooked and taking the two younger ones to gym to swim with them while Cameron swims.

Kiara was away on camp which meant I would be alone in the pool with both babies and I decided to rather leave Emma until Kiara was back. I am now so glad that I did that because it meant Jack and I have had two afternoons of uninterrupted one on one time doing something he loves. We swam for 45 minutes both days and then we had juice and ice cream afterwards.

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We forget how important this alone time is for our children. It is not always easy to manage, especially with more than one child but it is something that is so good for both them and us.

It strengthens the bond. I think that the last few days have actually been more beneficial for me than for Jack because it has reminded me that despite the tantrums and constant burping and demands of cupcakes daily, he is a very sweet, gentle little boy who does bring so much to our family.

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It has definitely changed his behaviour for the better. The last few days he has been so much calmer.There have been no tantrums in the car at school, little shouting and even less negative behaviour.

We have created memories. Hopefully he will remember us chasing each other in the pool and eating ice cream and running like a monkey through the ladies change room. If he doesn’t I have a few (blurry)  photos to remind him.

We caught up.He chatted non stop about anything and everything – school, his friends, things we were doing. It was nice just listening to him.

I am not sure we will manage this every week but when we can I am going to grab it with two hands.

How do you manage one on one time?

 

 

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6 Comments

  1. Ankia
    11 September, 2014 / 6:06 pm

    Shame man, so sweet. It must be hard to be his age with 3 other kids there. You should try to do it at least once a week with him ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. 11 September, 2014 / 8:07 pm

    I think he’s a quality time child ๐Ÿ™‚

    So precious and yes, we need the reminder too that they ARE actually sweet children 95% of the time!

    How I manage it? I consciously create the time because it’s a goal on my list every single month.

  3. 12 September, 2014 / 5:49 am

    I’ve seen similar behaviour from N. It really is amazing what a difference it makes. We do anything from cooking or painting together to going to the car wash, or even just for a walk.

  4. 12 September, 2014 / 9:58 am

    I have been battling tantrums and OCD too…you could be writing about my almost three year old. I try to spend an hour a day with him outside now that it is warmer. This way we only have each other and there are no toys or tv or phones. Sometimes he will play alone or sometimes he will come sit on me or we wander around together. He is a better child for the dedicated time.
    I do not battle the OCD thing. I have seen it with other kids too. Maybe they outgrow or like me, you take it to adulthood. It drives my husband batty to have two OCD people in the house, but I understand it and Hubby is tolerant. I try to stop and ask myself if it is really important that the socks are mismatched or if he wants a specific spoon. (I have serious spoon issues myself)

  5. 14 September, 2014 / 6:35 pm

    We have scheduled alone time with Son2 every Saturday morning while Son1 goes for his two hours of maths tuition. It does him the world of good. We go to the beach or to ride horses and we take LOTS of pics – he LOVES to pose for me. I am struggling to fit in alone time with Son1 and need to make more of an effort with that.

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