Surviving the sicks! It’s a battleground in here!

My kids seldom get sick. Jack is actually the only one who really seems to get anything significant but when he does get it, he doesn’t mess around and puts his whole heart and soul into experiencing the bug to the max.

Long story short, he was sick this week. Turns out it was his ears and throat so he is on a whole whack of meds (40% of which he has been vomiting up) and has been at home all week. We did send him on Tuesday but he was home before lunch.

I was managing to hold it all together – the vomit, the coughing, the whining, the four kids, the working with a 4 year old on my lap, the toddler attacking her brother, the bedtime trips to fetch Cam from swimming, the vomit, the cooking – you know just the usual stuff. But this morning I may or may not have lost the plot and danced around the lounge like a lunatic in my bright pink tracksuit pants! I just couldn’t take the freaking whinging and demanding and food being thrown all over. Shit was not held together so well at 8h30 this morning! 

Dealing with sick kids at home is like preparing for war!!! It really is!

You need to mentally prepare. Sick children will break your soul. After the first day of a crying child clinging to you, you do start to question all your life choices and you move from feeling deeply sorry for the child to swearing at the drug companies for their slow acting drugs! So you need to make sure you are mentally strong! Stay focused! Be strong!

There will be sleep deprivation. Don’t let it break you. Drink copious amounts of coffee, eat chocolate, get into a cold shower. 

You will have to dodge bombs. Depending on what your child has, you will find yourself dodging projectile vomit (don’t try catch it with your hands, you probably won’t be able to) and if you are super lucky projectile poo! Just remind yourself that they are your child and you love them very much. Hard hats and combat gear may come in handy during these explosions!

You will find yourself face to face with irrational tantrums. There are moments where I feel I would rather take my chances with an armed force than my toddler mid sick tantrum. This morning Jack wanted me to fast forward to a part in the movie but who knows which part. Guys I feared for my life at one point, his rage was real. Emma wanted to rub Cameron’s underarm on her tongue earlier today (she’s also not well) – the windows shook from the shriek she let out when I wouldn’t let her. 

You will long for simplier times. You will dream of those days you slept until 11h00, rolled into classes, partied all night, only had yourself to think about and ate hot food. You will wonder what you did to end up covered in vomit in your bright pink tracksuit pants staring longingly at the wine at 7h30 in the morning.

You will require post traumatic counselling. When your child has recovered and is happily back at school, you will find yourself suffering from the effects of the experience. The only way through this is with counselling. I suggest some kid free time, ideally with wine and Uber on speed dial!

I am now going back into the trenches – wish me luck!