I am extremely tense today! Like clubbing baby seals kinda tense!
I chatted to my mom briefly earlier and told her it’s her fault I worry so much about rubbish! She does it too. She always has. Often it’s a good thing because sometimes she will say “what about this” and I had never considered it before but it is not a good thing when I do it, especially when I lie awake at 3 in the morning worrying about random stuff!
Tania wrote about the same thing over here so I know I am not alone but do feel slightly crazy for the thoughts bouncing around in my head!
Mainly for the sake of purging let me share a few of the things I am currently worrying about….
- The new car – apart from the maintenance of the car I worry about parking it (which hasn’t been an issue…yet), I worry I am going to smash into the pipes/light in the underground parking, I worry about dropping the kids off (Kiara is battling to open the door and it makes me SO anxious).
- Cameron – he didn’t study much for these exams but still managed a 85% average for the exams BUT I still worry about the next exams and getting him to learn he needs to study.
- Kiara’s eating – or lack thereof!
- How I will cope when David is away next week (never mind that our routine is in no way actually disrupted).
- Being on time – I hate being late so much so that when I don’t have kids I generally arrive 10-15 minutes early wherever I go.
- If I have enough money in my account – even on pay day when I know there is enough I ALWAYS check while I am standing in the queue.
- The dog – are we being cruel keeping her in our tiny garden – I even let her on the couches because I feel so bad about her having a small garden.
- My parents! ALL THE TIME! I worry about something happening to one of them.
- Being broken into – do you know I have escape plans in case they do – they can break in from any door or the roof and I have an exit strategy!
- When I am in a gym class I worry the whole time that one of the teachers is trying to get hold of me and can’t.
- The baby! I worry every day all day about all the things that could go wrong.
And it goes on and on and on! AND ON!
It is exhausting and annoying! I hate it. As much as I try and push it out my mind, something will always come back!
David is almost the exact opposite which often frustrates us both because I can’t understand why he won’t move his car immediately when it starts hailing in Joburg and he can’t understand why I am freaking out when the sun is still out and there is no sign of a storm.
I know it has to do with control and I know it is not really rational and I am not looking for reassurance because I know it all but seem to have been handed a double dose of the “worry gene”.
Do you worry?
16 Responses
I can’t even imagine worrying so much Laura! I think you should start living on RESCUE.
I don’t worry very much, pretty much the only thing keeping me awake at night is my very wide awake 5 year old stroking my arm and waiting for an invitation to climb into bed with me…
You should try meditation or something to relax yourself, you have (soon) 4 kids and can hardly afford to have a heart attack!
I am exhausted just reading that! and I worry – my little Virgo nature dreams shit up for me to stress about. It’s very hard to let it go – I tell myself daily that worry will not change the course of events no matter what you do but I still worry. It is a sucky way to live and I see it reflected in my son: he has the exact same nature as me. So I have tried to ‘lighten up’ in an attempt to make him do the same. Sometimes it works, sometimes not…
Gosh! That’s a lot of worrying. Must be exhausting.
LOL you sound like me. I worry about absolutely everything… especially when I cannot control it
I think it must be the woman gene in us that makes us worry the “little things” sonehow most men seem to take problems in their stride. When it comes to finances and the kids i seem to worry the most. Hope everything works out soon in your favour
You’re not alone – I worry about all kinds of things too. I exhaust myself dreaming up solutions to potential future problems or trying to imagine every possible outcome of any biggish decisions I’m faced with.
On the upside, it’s very unlikely for me to get surprised by bad news of any kind. I most likely covered that shit in a dream mooooonths ago already! 😉
I do worry, alot. But I’ve gotten so much better at letting it go. My faith helps me though. I trust that God will take care of all my needs, even my silly needs that probably don’t really matter, I trust that He is in control and that my worry is a useless energy sapping disease! And wooossaaaaa, I let it go!
1 Peter 5:6-7 (PHILLIPS)
“So, humble yourselves under God’s strong hand, and in his own good time he will lift you up. You can throw the whole weight of your anxieties upon him, for you are his personal concern.”
Your mom sounds a lot like mine. I will never think about something and then she comes with: “But what if …”
Hate hate hate it.
Worrying gets you nowhere.
Go and get yourself some rescue and take that regularly during the day. YOu’re going to have a nervous breakdown if you carry on worrying about such minor things!
Right now I ma a bundle of worry and stress – the year’s been too long
lol love it! no bad surprises
that was to Louisa’s comment and yes, i clicked the reply to hers but it’s not nesting.
I love Jenn’s scripture – it’s one I share with people often because it’s so true. God is there and has the big shoulders.
I’m not a worrier (thankfully). Imagine being this driven and worrying about things going wrong? I’d never get anything done 🙂
that said, the thoughts do flit across my brain but my thought pattern is… ah, couldn’t be bothered to think about that til I need to 🙂 🙂
PS LOVE YOUR ESCAPE PLANS!!!
You and I are the same and my hubby like your D! I worry so much I have interesting dreams about things on my mind and sometimes it keeps me up at night! I’m learning to let go but it’s a real battle
You know that 90% of what we worry about never happens…don’t you? You have to let up my friend. It isn’t good for you or your wee baby if you get all stressed.
Oh dear. I could have written this post. I am a HUGE worrier. Always have been. It’s in my nature. It’s good and bad. My husband is NOT like this and it causes a lot of conflict because according to him I’m being negative and speaking kak into the universe. Being on ADs has made it somewhat easier for me to manage my worry gland. But, it’s nowhere near where it should be.